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Pepperidge Farm Goldfish
crackers are a popular item in our house. The kids love them
and since we have five kids, that’s a lot of love. I also give
them to whichever neighborhood kids happen to be around at
feeding time. I buy three or four bags of them at a time.
Currently, the Pepperidge Farm Goldfish people are running a
contest with lots of great prizes. Now, I’m not goofy enough to
think I’ll win a trip to Hollywood as a result of buying a bag
of crackers shaped like smiling fish (the odds are 1 in 10
million), however, I could win a music download. The odds of
winning a music download are 1 in 4. Those are good odds. I
like those odds and considering how many bags of smiling fish
crackers we use I would even go so far as to say I’m guaranteed
to win.
Thirteen bags down so far,
no wins.
NONE. I should have won 3
times by now! So, since I am using up all the non-winning bags
and making the odds better for everyone else, I did what any
sane person would do. I called the Pepperidge Farm Goldfish
cracker people.
Pepperidge Farm Goldfish
person: How may I help you?
Me: I just wanted to let
you know that I haven’t won any music downloads yet.
PFGP: Umm. Okay. Oh, are
you referring to our Goldfish promotion?
Me: Yes. I’ve been through
thirteen bags so far and I haven’t won anything.
PFGP: You’ve eaten thirteen
bags?
Me: Not by myself. I give
them to the kids. They love them. Anyway, thirteen bags and no
winners. I just wanted to let you know that I’m messing up the
odds.
PFGP: We’re glad to hear
that the kids love our crackers, sir, and I don’t think you’re
messing up the odds. We sell 3 billion bags a week.
(I think that’s what she
said)
Me: Well, alright, but
you’re probably going to have some people winning a lot and
getting all excited and jumping around and I just wanted you to
know who’s responsible.
PFGP: We appreciate your
concern. Since you haven’t had any luck with the bags you’ve
bought, can we send you a coupon and another game piece?
Me: You’ll send me a game
piece? Are the odds the same, 1 in 4?
PFGP: Yes, sir, the odds
are the same.
Me: Can you send me four?
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